Diving into the divine.

As much as I hate to admit,
I have fallen into the pit
the deep, dark, hopeless pit
called depression


Disheartening as it may sound
I like it here
I am comfortable here
I learned plenty here


So forgive me, if
I seem reluctant to come up
There is nothing left for me
and they could only love so much


In the bathtub
Staring into timed taps of water drops
the sound to which I found safety
and home


The water drops
slow but certain, and infinite
And I am certainly patient
for my moment to dive.


I have fallen into this abyss
so you, my dear, have to find another
Here I stay
so you will never fall in, too.

Please leave

Oh you
the love of my life
I surrendered my heart to you


An aspiring healer
through the fog of your vulgarity
I searched for you


You scorched my patience
stretched my faith
eventually


For a single wrong
I was abandoned
How simple


You left me wondering
Waiting
Writhing


And you returned, with similar ease
as when you left
oh you


I may have lost the one I loved
But you have lost
the one who loved you

Aida K.

If I see you again
I will not explain anything
I will not explain myself
We're way past that.

If I see you again
I will never ask what happened
Between us
Warm, then cold days later

If I see you again
I will ask of the present
and wish for a future
Our guard is up, I should know

If I see you again
I will wonder if you will ever know
or if you will want to hear
How could you, you're way past that

If I see you again
I will keep my distance
as you yours
I will hurt you no more.

If I see you again.

Expensive

if one of us has to go
i’d rather hope you go first

at least i could be there for you
for the rest of your life

and loneliness to you
is solitude to me

a second spent on me
is a second repaid to you

for the rest of my life
i am eternally indebted